"Sass Mouth" May Actually Be A Good Thing For Black Children

small child looking directly into the camera
Leslie Taylor-Grover
March 10, 2022

Having a “sass mouth” toward elders is taboo in Black culture. After all, our elders survived the worst times in history and laid the foundations for our communities – they deserve respect, right? 

Yet some parents are bucking the trend and teaching their children to speak up for themselves to everyone, including elders. Why?

During Jim Crow, both adults and children were required to behave as though they were inferior to whites. Even when a white person lied or was wrong, we had to agree or remain quiet. Breaking these rules was often used by white people to justify lynchings!

Unfortunately, the tradition of white people silencing Black “sass mouth” has only evolved over the years. Now, for example, white people use social media to make threats, “doxx” Black content creators, and even mimic Black voices through fake accounts. That’s why some Black parents are pushing back against the cultural norm of elder respect.

They’re encouraging their children to have boundaries, demand respect, and speak up about injustice. This type of liberated Black parenting is focused on building expressive, confident children who grow into unapologetically Black, socially aware adults.

There’s no handbook on ways to respect our elders, but one thing is certain. We show the greatest respect when we raise proud, problem-solving children who aren’t afraid to stand up for themselves and our communities!

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